If you need evidence of the creative bankruptcy of modern Hollywood, look no further than this: Sony has purchased the movie rights to video game Rollercoaster Tycoon in the hopes of turning it into a major motion picture. David Ronn and Jay Scherick, who wrote the Kevin James comedy The Zookeeper, will write what will be a live-action/CGI hybrid. I guess for kids.

I want you to think about that for a second: Grown men and women sat in well-appointed conference rooms and discussed this. They drove to the conference rooms in expensive cars. They were probably wearing suits at the time. Someone said something like, "You know what kids love? Roller coasters. And Tycoons."

"I see this as more than a physical roller coaster," he added. "I see it as an emotional roller coaster. Imagine Willy Wonka meets There Will Be Blood."

Eventually, a lot of money changed hands.

The writers are now working to get to the true emotional core of the Rollercoaster Tycoon games. Why is the titular main character so obsessed with thrill rides? What drives him? Who best to portray the unique mixture of whimsy and ruthlessness of a true tycoon of thrill park rides? I vote for Gene Hackman.

If this actually goes forward, some of the most talented artists and animators of our generation will spend months slaving over the look and feel of Rollercoaster Tycoon: The Movie.

All of the people who think Rollercoaster Tycoon: The Movie is a great idea live in very nice houses, by the way.